So, it’s the middle of December here in northern Baltimore County, and yet, today I hiked in a t-shirt. And even then I was pouring with sweat. Thanks to our good amigo El Niño, we hit a high of 72˚ here in the Baltimore area. Not very December-y. It was super weird to be that hot on a day with no leaves on the trees and the shadows almost at their longest for the year, but I enjoyed it nonetheless.
I always like to see how the river level has changed from week to week depending on recent rainfall, so this week I took a picture of the little rock island I pass every week on my hike. When the river is low, this pile of smooth river rocks (great for skipping!) almost stretches across the whole river, but this week, the island was not very prominent…about normal for this time of year.
This little rock island is my go-to frame of reference for week-to-week river depth. The picture I include at the end of every blog each week is another kind of frame of reference…the exact same view week after week is a great way for me to keep track of how the time of year affects the way the woods look.
In terms of my life journey, I’ve found frame of references incredibly helpful. Sometimes it’s a friend who reminds me of how far I’ve come, but even more helpful than that are my own words, captured in a journal, or even scraps of paper…whatever is at hand when I need to reflect on what’s happening in my life at the moment.
I’ve kept a diary off and on ever since I was about 8 years old…started out with the little green one with the lock and key. When I hit college and my first heartbreak, I transitioned to using accounting ledger books. I filled many of these, pouring out my thoughts at least daily, sometimes several times a day.
After college, my journaling became more sporadic, but there is a pattern…I always tend to journal regularly when I’m in a romantic relationship and especially if I’m just getting out of one. So I have a pretty detailed history of things that happened, decisions I made, and the way I felt about them.
These journals allow me to time travel when I’m feeling nostalgic…but more importantly, they allow me to really examine the events that have shaped the person I’ve become. They help remind me of what works and what doesn’t work for me in relationships. They remind me that a significant other always comes with wonderful qualities and plenty of flaws…just like me. They remind me that I can and will heal after every heartbreak.
The biggest takeaway I get from these (not so) gripping narratives? I can change. I have changed. I am not stuck, I am still growing, evolving, learning, becoming. It gives me so much hope when I read my writing from over the years. Hope that my story isn’t over…it’s still being written. This is never more important than when I get it stuck in my head that I’ll be single forever. Because I can’t know that. I’ve never been able to predict all the twist and turns God has taken me on in this life, and I never will be able to. My journals – my frames of reference – are proof of that.
If you are a fellow journaler, I invite you to give yourself a treat this week and read some of your older entries. Remind yourself of how far you’ve come. If journaling has never been your thing, consider giving it a try. It doesn’t mean you have to commit to writing every day or run right out and buy a fancy blank book. You could use your email to send yourself your thoughts as events unfold in your life. And if you’re not a writer at all, consider a recording app for your phone. There are plenty out there and they are easy to use. Just launch the app, press record, and start talking.
Let me know in the comments section below what you like to use as your frame of reference for your life. And if you have none, try coming up with one and let me know how it works for you! In the meantime, have an awesome week!
